Script discussion

ReiDavidson · Script discussion

All right, first is first. How do we start this thing off?

Guest

well I kinda had in mind a scene where the vigilantes will be fighting against 'the enemy' for a start.

our current cast (as of Feb 17) is:
[V-vigilante]
[L-Lawful]
[E-enemy/villian]
[O-open/loose]

Cyrus-V
Rekki-V
Redd-V
Sky-V
Katy-L
Aries-L
Rocket-L
Hikaru-O

3 lawfuls, 3 vigilantes, 1 open and no villians as of now.

Pending charas-
Vaine, Jinn, Shao, Moonlovers characters, etc

I dont think we have a clear image of who or what our villians are. Well, I don't. But I know we have none to script right now.

huh, guess Vaine'll be a villian after all.

Kxela

*weeps

why do I always....always.. Crying or Very sad

but i clicked the stay logged in button now so I should be good now.
Cool

ReiDavidson

Maybe the villians should be made up brand new...? I could use Fluke too.

Maybe a prologue is in order? Talking about history, alien attacks and stuff like that. We do have to explain the aliens first.

And remember Alex, we don't really have to introduce any actual bad guys for awhile now. It'll be fine to use Lawfuls.

darthmongoose

Keeping the reader in suspence about the 'enemy' could be a good idea. We could have the Lawfuls and Vigilantes scuffling and arguing, and makes lots of references to 'the enemy' or 'the evil', who don't actually turn up until the end of the chapter, so there's a kind of suspense.

MoonLover

Just wondering, do the enemies have to be human? *could make some mutated creature designs up* o_o

darthmongoose

'The enemy' are extra-terrestrial creatures. I was thinking of them as some kind of strange, faceless things. Not wierd and mutated with lots of teeth, more scarily hygenic and sterile looking, perhaps in some kind of all enclosing armour, but not quite human shaped. They are, after all, not invading the earth to take it over, but because the government of earth (or possibly of some country of earth) is paying them to attack with resources they desire (because people are easier to control when in a state of fear due to attacks).

ReiDavidson

Well I think the beginning fights should vary between the aliens and the lawfuls.

Okay, so at first, the vigilantes are fighting the lawfuls. Then later they're all fighting the aliens, which can kinda force them to work together. ^^;

.... Maybe we should start off with a fight scene between one vigilante character and one Lawful character? And behind that, we can add some narrative explaining about the aliens and stuff?

darthmongoose

Maybe have the story begin with the vigilantes watching the TV news, so that the news explains a large part of the narrative, while we can still establish the characters by having them comment on the news or talk amongst themselves while watching it in their hideout.
Suddenly the hideout is raided by lawfuls bursting in (maybe non-character lawfuls, just regular grunts in helmets), and a big firefight errupts. After the fight, the vigilantes escape, and the character lawfuls arrive at the scene, survey the damage and loses and decide to chase the trail of the Vigilantes. There's a short start of a car chase, which is suddenly interrupted by ALIENS!

ReiDavidson

I like the TV... Worried about how fast everything moves after that. XD

Okay... I think we're going to have to RPG this out a little. o.o;

Guest

Ummm, I think if you stick in the dialogue and how long action sequences take, it's actually quite long. I just summed it up in very short form. Haven't seen much of some of you online lately. Makes it hard to discuss things without leaving people out.

darthmongoose

Oh bloody hell! Now it's doing it to me too!

AluminiumDonut

So- and this is so very much a Donut question, here- what's their hideout like? I'm thinking some sort of a warehouse deeli-o, with lots of steel/cement/brick.

BUT THAT'S JUST ME, YO.

AND THIS IS THE SORT OF CRAP THAT ACTUALLY PLAYS A LARGE PART IN MY SCRIPTS.

WHICH ARE JUST SCRIBBLED ACTIONS, DESCRIPTIONS, AND BITS OF DIALOGUE IN A NOTEBOOK NAMED "THE COMMIE SWAMI"

...

...

...

*shuts up and gets back to drawring*

darthmongoose

Yeah, I'm thinking abandoned warehouse or factory that they've dragged some sofas and piles of cushions, and a TV balanced on a crate or some bricks to make a kind of sitting area in. So it's kind of this big, dark, unwelcoming stony building, with this cute cosy little corner that's been made into a little lounge area.

Kxela

ReiDavidson

I'm lovin' the warehouse. Do they live there or just meet there?

I vote live.

Donut (cantlogin)

I VOTE LIVE TOO. ;D

darthmongoose

Yeah, live. They all have a little office to themselves as a bedroom maybe, or make a room by blocking off a corner of the place with boxes.

Charil

Living in a warehouse sounds like awesome. And just has "vigilante" written all over it :0

Live ftw <3

ReiDavidson

Anyone who'd disagree is outvoted. XD

sweet, so what do we got?

Them in the warehouse.

So they're watching TV, it says something about... the aliens? Am I the only one who's really against them fighting the lawfuls just yet?

How about this. We start off in the warehouse, everyone's watching the telly, there's some report about the aliens. Our characters talk about it for a bit.

We should have all vigilante character designed with the coming of Jinn. ^^;

Sooo. We have that. Let's get them talking before there;s suddenly a special report of another invasion, and they go all "Ninja Turtles" (XD) and run off to go see to the trouble.

Cut to the Lawfuls and do something similiar with them.

I think whenever we draw the Vig's warehouse, it should be colourful and perty and bright, but the Laws should be sort of gray and boring and blank.

Maybe they're reporting in and have a brief chat with one another before they're suddenly deployed to take care of the alien enemy.

Then we end up having both the Laws and the Vigs fighting in the first fight scene. But we also get to introduce the characters so the reader can be like "oh *nodnod* I get it."

If that's okay with everyone, let's sort out the vig dialogue at the beginning since only you as the characters creator would have a good idea of what they'd say.

IF it's okay. *nod*

(... phew.)

Kxela

It'll work... but we gotta RPG this out in Chat ><;;

Okay.... that does it. We need to figure out when everyone else is on...

I'll be one tomorrow (friday for me)-
11:00am-2:00pm Eastern time
and
5:00-8:00pm at least or later..

ReiDavidson

Mew....

... I don't have internet at home and chatting in the computer lab would be... not a good idea.

I sometimes sneak on AIM but when and where I do it are both questionable things.

But since I have fridays off from school, there'd be no point in me, you know, going to the school at all. And I'd have no way to get there.

I'm sorry, I'm becomign a detriment because of all this moving stuff. ._.;

Kxela

a'right, scratch that.
It'll happen again sometime :3

Charil

Well if that's how it's going, I can, quite literally, be on at any time of day :0 Except 3AM to 3:30 PM eastern time on normal school days *shakes fist* Without prior notice of cancellation, that is >.> SO! Any time anyone decides on some time that this will eventually happen, let me know so I can stay up that late =3

darthmongoose

Hmmm, so the story starts off in the warehouse, with the TV explaining the situation to the reader. How the aliens have been attacking for about five years, but there's been no escalation to the conflict, nor has it decreased. And how several towns now have their own vigilante alien hunting teams. One of the Vigilantes says something like 'yeah, that's us!' when it's mentioned on TV that vigilantes are dangerous criminals.

Switch to the lawfuls, where the guys are given marching orders, possibly Katy is the one who relays orders and does communications and stuff (I dunno, her uniform just has that kind of look to it).

Back to the vigilantes, the same alien attack that the lawfuls were just given orders on, is reported on TV, and the Vigilantes all jump up.

Donut (cantlogin)

I submit that we do not rp the script.
I've rped scripts before and it just ends up being a trainwreck. Every. Damn. Time. They generally end up disjointed and surreal, but nto in the good way. It becomes POINTLESS DIALOGUE What ho! pip pip, tra la! POINTLESS DIALOGUE What ho! pip pip, tra la! and I am all for sassy banter, but too much sassy banter is like too many tribbles. You can barely wade through them to make your way to the bathroom.
Plus, I'd like to see what kind of dialogue we would come up with for other people's characters.
I think we should just discuss it all and all input things in a thread so we can sculpt and streamline every single thing together.

JUST A THOUGHT.

<3

Donut (cantlogin)

Also, y'know, we're never on at the same time. More would probably be achieved if we did NOT rp it.

Charil

.. I must say I agree ^^;

Especially if you're bringing in the point of useless dialogue. Because when Charil narrates, she rambles like a politician. Saying a million different things in cryptic order, but never actually saying anything substantial.

The idea of pre-set dialogue sounded a bit appealing, but Donut brings up some good points.

AluminiumDonut

NO ONE ASIDE FROM CHARIL HAS SAID A THING. I TAKE THIS AS A SIGN THAT YOU ARE ALL SHOCKED AND AWED BY MY BRILLIANCE.

(not)

OKAY CREW- HERE IS HOW I AM SEEING IT-

TEH HYPER NOVA

A COMIX OF AWESOME

BY AWESOMES

(establishing shot of warehouse GRATUITOUSLY COPYING AND PASTING MY CONCEPTART BECAUSE RELALY WHO WANTS TO DRAW THAT AGAIN)

perhaps over this goes the start of the newscast- in the lower right hand corner, I am thinking, so one's eyes flow over the establishing shot and land on the writing)

"Blah blah newscast words that are not about monsters and thus are unintersing to Donut. "

now it's our vigilantes watching teevee. Whoever's drawing can throw in whatever cute personal touches they want. Or we can discuss thems later. This is just a skeleton.

"newscast words blah. ALIENS R BAD What ho! pip pip, tra la! GUBMINT IS AWESOME BUY FRUITY OATY BARS OH, ALSO, VIGILANTES ARE BAD, TRUST ONLY IN BIG BROTHER."

Our heroes snicker and snack and snicker some more! Perhaps a voice of reason is, in fact, reasonable about the bad press.

--

MEENWHILE, in some sort of awesomely huge gubmint skyscraper or military complex or something, the military folk are suitin' up for militaritude. We need military folk, guys! must work on that. Or sometihething. Militay= a pretty recent development in our scribblings, innit?

--

Simultaneously, our heroes have also heard of the alien attack, presumably through teevee. They PREPARE FOR BATTEL!

-------------------------

Okay, so this is just a rehash of everything we've already established. What I want you guys to do now is RIP THIS THE HELL APART. Suggest things we may add in that you feel might be necessecary (can't spell that word!), suggest things are pointless. Suggest nifty dialogue, teeny little actions, minute details in the background, ANYTHING!

ReiDavidson

Here's my problem. Jinn is a very hard character to peg his personality unless you see him in action...

... Tell you what, I'll volunteer for the first sequence with the vigilantes. Because I'm going to be very anal on how Jinn is introduced and when it comes to my characters, I go uber-bitch. So to avoid any uber-bitch situations, I'll just bite the bullet and go first.

Sound good?

if I need help with someone's character's personality, I'll ask.

Charil

Sounds good Very Happy

I've been wondering at when would be a good time to bring this question up, and I guess since now we're talking about who's starting and whatever, so here goes.
How is it we'll decide who draws when and how much? I mean, it was mentioned... either in this thread or the very first one that we'd divide it up based on who can do what types of scenes best, but would we just all post what our specialties are, or will someone pipe up and suggest "Okay, I think so-and-so should draw this-and-that", or would we all volunteer like Rei just did? IMHO, volunteering sounds like the best option ATM, but that's open-ended because... well, I should never, ever make final decisions on things ._.

ReiDavidson

Um... sorta like a pop system maybe? Volunteer but you can't volunteer again till everyone goes? I suppose we could establish an order and then decide from there.

I vote that each person does a sequence, unless one is particularly long, then they split it with someone else.

darthmongoose

Doing sequences based on the abilities and specialities of the individuals is a good idea. Rei doing the first bit is probably a good idea, because he's the only character who we haven't seen in a comic. I mean, you already know a little about how Rekki speaks, and her body language and stuff through seeing her in FanDanGo, same goes for the other characters from comics.

Speaking of which, I should start a thread on speech modes, body language and oddities.

ReiDavidson

Exactly, but we should make sure that everyone does a part before reusing someone else.

darthmongoose

hmmm. So the script begins kind of like:

Shot of the warehouse (use Donut's warehouse pic for this, I think, because it's cool. Scale it to fit in the middle of an otherwise blank, black page with just commentary.) The commentary of the TV continues throughout the scene as the inside of the warehouse is shown, focusing in on the cosy little 'lounge' corner where the Vigilantes are sprawled on sofas, cushions, chairs, the floor.

Dialogue is something like:

"Today's surveys show that there has been no increase in the attacks by the mysterious alien menace, but the assaults have shown little sign of decreasing. The Government advises citizens to stay alert and not wander too far from large cities. Those who remain out in the country may be in darger of attacks from alien forces, or the ever increasing numbers of roaming gangs or self-proclaimed 'Vigilantes'..."
(Vigilantes talk amongst themselves briefly, something like: )
"Hah!"
"Oh yeah, that's us, attacking those foolish people who don't just go to cower under the lawfuls like sheep.."
"Man, this is why I hate network news."
"Guys, Can you be quiet and listen?"
(commentary continues)
"In other news, it seems that children born with strange powers, known commonly as 'Skytouched', are on the increase. The Government denies this is to do with the war, but does warn those who find themselves or their children developing unusual powers should register on their census for the protection of themselves and others. Telltale signs, other than actual displays of power, include areas of hair turning pure white prematurely..."
(Vigilantes again)
"Yeah, Registering will do you a WHOLE lot of good."
"Been there, tried it, got the dogtags..."
"Oh noes! The dangerous skytouched are out to kill us all!"
"You guys have ADD or something? We're trying to keep track on the news here!"

Errr, something like that anyway. Not sure.

ReiDavidson

One more thing I need to know before I start....

How are all the vigilante characters related to one another. Who are friends, who fights, who pretends to despise one another but actually likes one another?

Jinn's impressions would be as follows.

Sky - He'd get a kick out of Sky. I'm sure between the two of them they annoy the snot out of everyone else.

Rekki - He probably hits on her, gets hit, gets huffy but tries again. It depends on the situation. He has the capacity to care about her, but not to show it. ^^; So he'll worry about her and protect her but he won't act like it in everyday situations. they'll be a tad complicated I'm sure...

Redd - Depending on how Redd treats him, Jinn'll either be neutral towards him or act like an obnoxious big brother.

Leon - About the same. I can see these two arguing quite a bit though. They're probably the two that just start yelling at each other before someone shuts them up and things go on.

Cyrus - Jinn doesn't like indifferent or rude attitudes, so they'll probably argue, but it'll be in a more serious "OMGkillJOO!!!" way. ._.; the rest of the group probably tries to keep them seperated and the two of them probably try to avoid one another for the sake of the team.

Post your characters impressions of everyone else's (just vigilantes for now...) and correct me if you think I predicted a relationship wrong... Like, Charil, if you feel Cyrus and Jinn wouldn't hate one another, speak up. ^^;

Charil

ReiDavidson

Aw, he's cute in a asshole-ish way.

darthmongoose

Ok, I'll go with Rekki here:

Sky: Rekki and Sky share a common unstoppable drive and obsessive nature, so they get on surprisingly well. Sky is a very loyal and honest person despite being borderline insane, and so Rekki trusts her and treats her as a kind of war buddy/comrade. The only problem is that putting the two together could be dangerous without somebody to bring them both down to earth.

Jin: Rekki is secretly somewhat impressed at Jin's perseverence, and enjoys punching him because he can take a punching. She takes his attention as being entirely her due (Rekki has a secret vain streak, as you expect from such a proud character) but considers herself out of Jin's league. She does respect him as a warrior and a friend though.

Redd: Redd is a determined guy, and Rekki has a great deal of respect for him. She thinks he's a cool guy to hang with, and a good ally in battle. Maybe she wishes he'd show her attention in a more than simply friendly way... Together they make a good fighting duo because they both act on instinct.

Leon: Leon is reckless and hot tempered. In other words, he and Rekki have a fair bit in common. Problem is that this tends to cause them to clash. Rekki views Leon as being like a sibling, she cares for his safety, but can't help getting into arguments with him if they're stuck in a room together because they both like to do things their own way.

Cyrus: Rekki is always in conflict about Cyrus. At times she thinks he's an admirable man for his ability to think things through and consider the risks, as well as his sarcastic wit, but if he says anything directed at her, she'll probably go into 'angry teen' mode and want to rebel against him, and will answer back or act contrary to everything he would want her to do.

ReiDavidson

So so far Cyrus is a bit of a blacksheep, Jinn is thought of as maybe a bit goofy, but well-liked, Cyrus and Jinn, despite being allies, are rivals, Redd is a little brother figure, Rekki comes off like she's a bit of a leader, Sky is also considered goofy but well-liked, and Leon probably gets into rows with everyone, but never gets hard feelings set on him.

Good dynamics, who else has input?

darthmongoose

The vigilantes probably don't have an official leader, and it's unlikely Rekki would consider herself to BE the leader, but she may well come across seeming like one. Even though she isn't a knight in this reality, she still has the kind of proud, noble warrior bearing you might associate with one. She's become a little more cynical, and is less stiff about upholding the laws in the Hypernova universe, but she still has that feeling about her, like she's meant to be a knight, but is just in the wrong time and place.

ReiDavidson

I kinda got that impression too.

Okay, last last question. ._. How long has everyone known everyone else for?

Like who were the original vigilantes?

Who are the oldest friends?

Who are the newest members?

darthmongoose

Hmmm, I don't know about the others, but Rekki has probably been a vigilante for about a year and a half. She joined the Lawfuls at fifteen, served for a year and a half, becoming increasingly cynical and disenchanted with the system, then suddenly went AWOL and was found by a vigilante group as she wandered around looking lost and bashing aliens to death with a telephone pole because her lazer gun was out of batteries.
She's since dyed her hair red and taken to using a revolver as a die hard vigilante.
Rekki won't be the very longest serving member, but from the relative ages of the group, she probably isn't the newest.

ReiDavidson

I wanna say Sky and Jinn are the founders. Not the leaders because both would rather not have the responsibility, but the originals. I also wanna say they've known each other longer than anyone else.

I'd say the order is

1. Jinn and Sky
2. Rekki
3. Cyrus
4. Redd
5. Leon

You think, maybe? Smile

Kxela

Charil

darthmongoose

Sounds like a good order to me. So that means that even if Donut and Moon-chan were to object (which I doubt they would) the vote would go through anyway. ^_^

Kxela

My post was an objection!!!
.
.
.
>>
<<
>>

er, not really.

ReiDavidson

Okay so I have enough info, just need to figure out when to do it, seeing as I disappear for weeks at a time.